Today... my father in law passed away. At 9:35 a.m. Pacific time. He was 83 years old... he took his last breath with my husband beside him as well as the hospice nurse and his care giver who has been with him for the last year and a half. He was not suffering long, thankfully... and he did not seem to be in any pain, he was sleeping when he passed.
My main concern now, is for my husband.
I wish I could say that all that was on our minds -- on his mind -- was mourning the loss of a loved o ne. Sadly, there will be much more to it than that. My brother in law is... well, no other way to put it -- he's a complete pain in the #@!$. He is 40 years old and has never moved out of the house and has been fully dependent upon his parents all of his life. He has been harassing my husband since their mother passed 2 years ago -- about keeping the home and allowing him to live in it for the rest of his life.
For many reasons, this is not going to happen. Although my FIL's will states tha tthe home is to be sold, we know now to expect a legal contest to the will... and everything will be going through probate with the additional burden of my BIL making it even more difficult.
It is a very long, drama ridden story that I will not bore anyone with -- suffice it to say -- the worst is still yet to come. But for today -- I'm hoping and praying for my husband -- that he is able to take some time alone to grieve for his loss. I wish I were there with him, but won't be able to go for a few more days.
Jun 2, 2008 | 12:27 PM PST
I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers. We know someone that will be in this kind of a situtation in a few years. It is a nerve wrecking thing to deal with.
Jun 2, 2008 | 1:20 PM PST
I'm so sorry April. When my dad died 10 years ago, he left a mess also. He'll be dead 11 years in September-We still have not settled his estate which only amounted to a few acres. I feel for you, girlie, lots of feelings get hurt.
Jun 2, 2008 | 1:39 PM PST
April, please accept my condolences on your loss. I hate that families have to fight and ruin each other's lives when a loved one passes away. I was determined not to have that happen when Mom passed and my brothers were very agreeable to everything I wanted to do. It was so nice to get things done in a civilized manner without conflict. I am wishing you and your husband strength and wisdom for the struggle ahead.
Jun 2, 2008 | 6:03 PM PST
I'm sorry for your loss. Everyone mourns differently and unfortunatly some people think they are the only ones going through the loss. Instead of bonding people separate sometimes. I haven't seen one of my brothers since Dad passed on. It takes time to heal even if it is an death that you know is coming. God bless you and yours.
Jun 2, 2008 | 8:02 PM PST
I'm so sorry for your family's loss. Will be praying for your family as you all go through this difficult time. I know how difficult families can be at a time like this, our family has gone through similar circumstances, it seems to bring out the worst in some people and makes the grieving even harder for the others.
God Bless and keep you