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Posted: Mar/06/2009 11:53 AM PST
As many of you know, my mother was struggling with Ovarian Cancer for the past year. She went home to the Lord on Monday, March 2nd. Her funeral was yesterday. Our family is so heart broken but relieved that she is no longer suffering. Below is something I wrote for her funeral. I hope some you take something from it. Appreciation It has been difficult for me to imagine there is a God in heaven since Mom became ill. In fact, there were times when I cursed him. Suffice it to say, I have a lot of questions for God when I meet Him. However, Mom never stopped believing that she would be with God and our Lord Jesus Christ when she died. The prayer that I am about to read is specifically about Jesus Christ, the Lion of Judah. Grandma Gilsinan gave this prayer to Mom when Dad had a heart attack at the ago of 32. Mom was terrified that she would lose her husband, whom she loved so very much, and she was afraid for us, thinking she would somehow have to raise us without our father. This prayer gave her strength and ultimately, she believed God healed Dad. She passed this prayer on to a friend years later whose husband was ill. She gave me the prayer when Kenneth was sick. Right now I feel that my heart is irreparably broken, however in looking back over this past year and especially over the last few days of Mom’s life I see a purpose, perhaps a hint of a plan that Mom subconsciously made with God. Dad and we five siblings spent almost every moment together in the past few days. Not since before we moved out, married and so on had we been together for so long. Over the years, whether we are a child, sibling, spouse, or grandchild, without realizing it we begin take each other for granted. We lose sight of who our family members are; we don’t know each other very well as we grow older. We assume that others know we appreciate them. Last week when I was sitting with Mom and telling her how much I loved and adored her, and was thanking her for the Mom that she was, she said, “finally I know that I am appreciated.” I was shocked and heart broken to hear her say this because I always assumed she knew how much she was appreciated. In Mom’s last days she taught me a new appreciation for her, for Dad, my husband, my siblings and sister’s in law, my children and my nieces and nephews. I believe this is the contract Mom made with God. As difficult as it is for me to let Mom go, I believe God was in that room with all of us, telling Mom; ‘Look around you Edna, your family is here together, supporting one another, and they are stronger for it. Well done Edna, let me take you home.’ Behold the Lion of Judah The cross of the Lord Fly ye evil powers The lion eye of the tribe of Judah The root of David has conquered. Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujuh! Karen B. |
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Posted: Mar/06/2009 2:12 PM PST
Eternal rest grant unto Her O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon her; may she rest in peace. Amen |
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Posted: Mar/06/2009 2:31 PM PST
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It is always hard loosing such a close loved one no matter how prepared you think you may be. Our prayers will be with you and your family that you may find comfort in this hard time. |
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Posted: Mar/06/2009 2:49 PM PST
I'm sorry about your mother passing. There is nothing harder than losing your mother. My mom passed away 3 years ago this month and there is never a day I don't think about her. She was my partner in gardening. It gets easier with time but you never forget. |
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Posted: Mar/06/2009 4:56 PM PST
What you wrote was so dear. Thank you for sharing your precious words. God Bless you & take care~Andrea |
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Posted: Mar/06/2009 6:29 PM PST
Thank you for your kind thoughts and prayers. Karen |
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Posted: Mar/07/2009 2:05 AM PST
I am so sorry to hear that, but as you said, she is now at peace with the Lord in her brand new body. I hope that you find peace also. God bless you. |
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Posted: Mar/07/2009 7:40 AM PST
A friend who lost her mother to cancer several years ago told me that I would see subtle signs sent by my mother. All of this week I have been wishing my mother would talk to me. This morning as I sat on my back porch drinking my coffee and watching the birds at the feeder a Bald Eagle came to my back yard. This is significant in so many ways, firstly I live in the suburbs, I have never seen a Bald Eagle here before. Secondly, and most importantly my mother loved eagles, she cross-stitched a very large eagle, and did other eagle projects that were hung in their home over the years. I am certain the Eagle was sent by Mom. It brought tears to my eyes. I called my Dad right away and told him about it. He agreed, it was Mom. Karen |
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Posted: Mar/07/2009 10:20 AM PST
You'll get tired of hearing it, but it does get easier with time. My Mom died 10 years ago on Feb. 8 after a long time of dealing with all the bad things diabetes and heart disease can give you. She lived with me for almost 2 years, and I've never regretted it. I only wish I had been better for her. There is peace in knowing that you did everything you could for her. God bless. |
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Posted: Mar/07/2009 11:06 AM PST
I am so sorry for your loss dear Karen, but so thankful that she is with the Lord. That in itself is such a blessing. I know that you will meet her with the Lord some day and that you can stand even now and say it is not goodbye, but only see you later  May the Lord bring you and your family peace and comfort in Jesus name..amenRR |
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