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gardenbug8's posts about: Anna
Mar 27, 2008 | 9:42 AM PST
Tag: Anna
The Lord will carry you in your long journey my dearest Anna. I will buy an African Violet that you loved so much. It will forever remind me of you so I will cherish that African Violet as if it was you and it will have a very special place in my garden.
Mar 26, 2008 | 2:30 PM PST
Tag: Anna
I am so thankful that I have a place to go when I wake up in the morning. The only time I do not think of my sister Anna is when I go to my garden, check which flowers are blooming, weed, water and just about do anything I can think of to forget, otherwise, all that is in my mind is imagine how my sister had been suffering in the last 2 to 3 months. Why the Almighty is prolonging her pain, I have no answer, only to believe that He is the one to decide, not me, not the doctors, not her family. I know she will leave us soon and for her it will end but it won't end for us she will leave behind. I was up late today, almost past 7:30 a.m. I went outside to my garden and there where blooming clematis today, Ruby Glow completely covering the planter with its many blooms, Grandiflora up in the arbor, Lasurstern, Multi Blue, Niobe and Empress. And I can see the freesias enticing a bee with its fragrance. I would like to cut them all off and give them to her as a token of my love but she can't even hear me or see me anymore, just breathing to let us know the Lord has not yet taken her away. It will be soon, my loving sister.
Mar 23, 2008 | 8:48 AM PST
Tags: Easter , Anna
Wow, even though it was cold and windy, it was a pleasant surprise to attend my first outdoor Easter service. Glad that I bundled up as advised. The service was held up on a hill with a single white cross. The road was long and narrow but getting there was half the fun. The hill was close enough to see the bottom of the mountains where a few cows were grazing. Too bad the sheeps were not there, the first time in years, as they said, that they were not. Now I know that from my house, these were the mountains that I can see from my backyard. There was also a beautiful creek near the road. The whole view was an awesome sight, a huge farmland with only a single old red barn and nothing else but mountains and the all green grazeland. The beauty of it all was a sight to see. How can one not believe that there is a higher power creating this beauty? I wish I had taken my camera (maybe someday just to go see the sights again). And then comes the service as the sun was rising. I was so overwhelmed, from the sermon, to the rising sun, the mountains, the creek, and the vast green land. I know if Christ did not die, there is no life hereafter. Happy Easter my dearest Anna, your life will begin anew.
Mar 16, 2008 | 3:40 PM PST
Tag: Anna
Today is Palm Sunday. At church service’s prayer request, I asked that Our Lord takes Anna home. At the service, all I could think of was my sister Anna. I often wondered why God is prolonging her sufferings. Maybe it is to bring us closer to Him, that nothing is more important in our lives than to know Him and have a relationship with Him.
She would slip into a coma now and then but would wake up stronger in spirits even when her body is withering physically. I was told that a couple of days ago when she woke up, she said that she dreamt that she is not terminally ill and she is happy in her dream and in the garden I made for her. She was admiring the lilac and white bougainvillea that I planted in one spot and wondering why there are two colors in one plant. You see, there really are two plants in that one spot as I planted them together myself, a white and lilac bougainvillea. She had seen the blooms on those plants and carried the image to her dream. When she woke up, she asked why she was in her sick room, that she thought she was in the garden. So she asked to be taken to the garden, as weak and ill as she was. She did not want to be taken back to her sick room. She wanted to stay in the garden and enjoy the sun and the flowers. So you see, a garden is really paradise here on earth when you know that a terminally ill woman can still enjoy the garden, the flowers and the beauty of it all.
I got a phone call from my niece today that Anna has gone back into coma. I cried my heart out again and got very depressed as I am here in California and not able to hug and kiss her as she is in our native land. As I was helpless and depressed, I went to the living room and looked outside. A little brown bird then flew in front of the lawn close enough for me to enjoy the way it was walking so slowly, looking around and trying to find what it was looking for. I wondered maybe it was not looking around for something. Maybe God sends it my way to lift me up and dry my tears. The small bird stayed a very long time, walking around and around, pecking on the grass and coming back closer to the window. I watched that bird and I forgot everything as I was fascinated by the way it was walking. I will never forget that sight, a bird waving its tail to me, showing me its graceful walk, God’s way of telling me that we are all His creatures and He takes care of all of us, and enabling me to be strong enough to write this blog.
Again, I beg pardon if you happen to read my blog and you’re offended. If not, I humbly asks of you to just say a little prayer for Anna.
Mar 13, 2008 | 3:36 PM PST
Tag: Anna
I spent all day today gardening. It gave me some peace of mind, forgetting a little bit what I am feeling all day. My younger sister is in coma again today. She is now down to 80 lbs. and having morphine day in and day out to ease her pain from pancreatic cancer. Gardening since I woke up at 5 a.m., no lunch yet and it is now 3:30 p.m. I finally stopped and went inside for lunch but even that I can't seem to do. I feel the hunger pain but really no appetite so instead I am writing this blog, just to get this terrible feeling out of my system. Gardening truly helps and the crying. It relinquishes my soul. Anna, my sister, you will be in heaven soon where there will be no more tears nor pain. It is okay to let go. And say hi to mom and dad too when you get there. I am sure they are waiting for you with open arms. I love you so. P.S. So sorry if I offend anyone.
